Have you ever wondered about the way individual temperament shapes the way your kid goes through life?

All the people they fancy and all those they don’t, how they handle problems, show emotions or the way they refuse to cooperate.

It all matters. And you should try to nurture those natural reactions in your little one’s personality. That’s his uniqueness.

Though no one is quite sure whether it’s pure genetics that shapes who we are, or is it the street, let me tell you one small secret. All the frustrations my son shows throughout the day, he got from me.

Disorganised when his play corner’s in a mess, angry for the forbidden fruit and similar. And even though routine changing upsets all the little dudes, I swear I see myself in his messy little reaction!

Well, he may be the picture-perfect of his dad, but I let him forever borrow more than half of my heart, brain cells and temperament! And here’s why I think it’s so important to let them grow as they are (even nurture some sides of them you cannot control).

It’s only right.

Whilst this little one may be hard to handle sometimes, I love his angry voice and his smart answers. He’s that stubborn to drive us nuts when we say “bedtime”, but stubborn when teaching to sing “Crazy little thing called love” on his own too.

All the music he plays all day long, how quickly he acts during our learning hours (read more here) and how he melts our hearts serving us breakfast in bed on Sundays – priceless.

But could he be such joyful little one if we hadn’t decided to spend the money on his hobby (which is music), books, nutritious food and organisation? Of course, I don’t mean it’s all about the money and that only people who have quite enough of it can raise happy children.

I simply want to point to all those parents who spend it on random toys and expensive clothes. It’s only right to listen, to treat them as if they were grown-ups and not laugh at the “crazy ideas” they ask of you or share with you.

Next time you’re about to buy that wooden dollhouse that goes perfectly with all the other furniture in the playroom, think again. Your girl may not be like all the other of her age, she may be into science, sports or even cars.

Who they are now, we must not suffocate. How they find solutions, we should approve. What they seek for, what fires up their emotions, we need to follow.

Now, my boy may pour all the disobeying of the world on me, but I love when he speaks for himself. And, if it doesn’t concern his discipline, manners and life choices, I’m fine about him being a not that much obedient little one.

Related: Why I refuse to raise and obedient child (and why you should do the same)?

How to nurture individual temperament?!

Almost every celebrity has that special support from a grown-up who stands behind him. When David Bowie decided to leave school and his dad supported him all the way and bought him a saxophone, he accidentally has raised a man who has changed the world.

Hugh Jackman said that his father refused to buy him fancy shoes, but spent a fortune on books and was another dad who has bought a saxophone. Taylor Swift is yet another celebrity who is a college dropout, but also one pretty intellectual artist who never stopped educating and growing intellectually.

You should have figured out by now what passions you must nurture. And even if not, here’s my guide on how to set up resolutions for your kids the right way (their way).

Finally, onto the top 5 rules you must follow if you want to raise a human that loves what he’s doing. Don’t set too many boundaries and follow your hearts.

1 Don’t play the blame game.

Don’t ever blame the kid, yourself, or your partner for that special individual temperament you cannot fully control. Even when you see the downs of a certain behaviour, it may be a perfect skill they’ll need later in life.

2 Accept.

Of course, you might be a total opposite from what I’ve said earlier and your baby might just be that little “too obedient” child. You’d like her to be more like you, wild and free, but hey! You are responsible for her life, but it’s not your life.

Wanna raise a successful and happy grown up ready to change the world however they can?! Then accept them for who they are, even when you find it hard to follow.

3 But play the role.

So, you’ve done an amazing job deciding to let your mini other parent or mini you follow their dreams. But you’re the one to navigate them to a room full of applauses. Whilst you shouldn’t force an artistic soul to study hard, you can’t go vice versa either.

BUT, your responsibility is to make their life easier. You do it by educating them yourself, sharing honest advice and support on a way up stairs. Read this guide to learn what I teach my 4-year-old throughout the day.

4 Labeling is a big no.

All right, not easy to deal with a shy kid at all. So often, my lips would want me to say to others “he’s shy but he’ll figure his way to a crowd eventually”! Oh, but instead of doing that – pointing to him “you’re shy so act like that”, I shut up, no matter the talks and the eyes on me.

I’m completely aware of who he is, but given the fact he has so many talents hidden inside, I refuse to label him that way. Instead, my choice is to teach him (and let him find solutions on his own too) that humans are wonderful.

That I’m afraid many times too and that’s how he and I handle human beings. But we need them and we are brave to let them step inside and love each others.

5 Err, any good sides here?

I am completely aware that 45% of this post sounds negative. Anyway, my goal was to prove that the unusual “negative sides” are what you should accept with responsibility.

Destructive kids might need a bit more of time spent outside when they can throw a ball or throw rocks in the river, run and yell. Even though it’s harder to handle those children, remember that there’s a huge chance for them to become great at sports. Accept them now to lead them to be champions.

We let our kid paint near to every wall in the house because that seemed like a good way to let of any frustrations. Nowadays, he spends most of his time in those panted corners, expressing himself making music and other arts.

Nurture individual temperament, raise winners.

See how important it is to nurture the individual temperament? It helps them be their best selves going through life peacefully exploring what they love doing with their highest energy.

Aaaand… One more thing before you go!

Although talents, temperament, physical appearance and intelligence they get through genes, there are many other things parents give through teaching. Such as discipline and manners, responsibility, love and kindness.

Have I encouraged you to look at those sides of your little one others call “difficult to handle” or “bad behaviour” in a different way? What do you think of them and what’s your way to divert such behaviour to actions that serve them?

Let us know in the comments below what are your parenting rules and how do you nurture individual temperament?